5 Secrets of CLEAR Communication


Did you know that there are 5 secrets of CLEAR communication in any relationship, whether personal or business?

Communication is the cornerstone of relationships and being more aware of how you engage with others is key to ensuring that the lines of communication are clear and everyone’s message is heard.

Do you find yourself wondering…

  • Why is it so hard for people (even yourself at times) to say what they mean and mean what they say?
  • Why is it easy to communicate with some people, yet it can be a struggle with others?
  • Why are your messages sometimes misconstrued, causing unintentional havoc or pain?


The key to resolving these challenges is CLEAR communication. By relying on these five components, you will create a strong foundation for all of your relationships:

  1. Clarity
  2. Listening
  3. Engagement
  4. Attention
  5. Respect


Each of these require that you be present in all of your verbal exchanges…not just shoot from the hip.

Think about the last conversation you had with someone today. It’s likely that one or both of you were in a rush. Think over the discussion and ask if these 5 components were present.

  • Were you both clear with your message, providing details and not just vague tidbits of information?
  • Did you take the time to listen to one another or was the conversation one-sided with the other unable to interject much?
  • Were you both focused on the conversation and not the billion other things you have going on in your day?
  • Did you look one another in the eye as you spoke and really pay attention to the other person’s words, body language and facial expressions?
  • Were you both respectful or was there a lot of interrupting and cutting off to speed things along?


In the beginning stage of a relationship, you have a tendency to think before speaking. You often weigh your words carefully and speak with caution so your thoughts and needs are delivered in a way that are sure to be understood. So what changes?

When you feel comfortable with someone, you no longer feel the need to be cautious. You make assumptions like, “He or she is in a hurry too. They don’t need all this information, they can remember from last time. There’s no need to be polite, he or she knows I appreciate them.”

The fact is, you stop thinking about how your words come across and just blurt things out!

When the stakes are high, it is a given that this will adversely affect a relationship, but what about everyday conversation? Negating someone’s feelings unintentionally or making a sarcastic comment at someone’s expense can land you in hot water. What you may think of as humor can come off as demeaning and hurtful to others.

Just as important, don’t  assume that the other person knows information that may not have been communicated entirely.  Be clear and check in by asking pertinent questions. Leave no room for error, as this can lead to incomplete tasks and confusion.
Remember what you were taught in preschool; say please and thank you when appropriate! They should not be merely implied as this alone can contribute to a feeling of being taken for granted and not appreciated.

Now, you’ve likely been on the giving and receiving end of poor communication; we all have. But, what I’d like for you to share with us is an example of a time when you experienced or provided excellent communication. Post them below and help us all to learn how to be better communicators!

Ellen Nastir

Ellen Nastir

About The Author

Ellen Nastir is a certified professional coach with advanced training in Positive Intelligence, Organization and Relationship Systems Coaching, and Positive Psychology. Certified in virtual training, she works with individuals, teams and businesses in person and virtually.